Feeling uncomfortable about your recent purchase? We’re sorry, that’s just the Dewey Proffitt Sales Method.

Our clients are used to having buyer's remorse, but they know if they call Dewey up to cancel, he'll end up selling them more stuff they don't need. Yep, he's that good.

When he answered our craigslist ad we knew during that first interview we better hire him to sell for us, because he was the perfect Half Fast salesman. Besides, his talents were being underutilized at the used car lot and vacuum store in town.

During his job interview we thought he said he sold ice to eskimos, which is impressive.

Turns out he actually said he "sold ice in Okemos". He was a route vendor and sold ice in Okemos, Michigan.

Oh well, shout out to Okemos. Go Blue! Ooops, sorry Sparty. Go Green! 

Favorite book: The Art of the Deal

Favorite movie: Glengarry Glen Ross